Category: Death & Loss

The Drowning.

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Anguish
as waters frosted by twilight
weigh upon gossamer wings.
Deceived by a thirst unquenched,
I descend upon a reflection,
sinking into myself.

Imprisoned
within bitter tides,
I reminisce of a life relinquished–
where pinions sway unfettered
above blossoms coaxed by spring,
flittering from bud to bloom,
each bead of nectar
a fragrant haven.

Peering above to
heavens turned black,
tapestries of stars taunt
as they unbraid before me.
Below bitter waters,
shadows enshrined
whisper silently,
beckoning.

By the lure of
exhaustion
I succumb
to the abyss’
waiting embrace,
the warmth within now
a quivering of a fading flame.

I enter into the void.

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When the Heart Stops.

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A cardiac arrest. A resuscitation made. A life recovered.
One patient tells me his experience.
This is his story.

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Death.
Amid the chaos enclosing,
beseeched by an ambiance of ages to come,
I hear the seraph’s dulcet calls.
Immured by words 
divine and bittersweet,
they sculpt the frigid air,
and I am comforted.
As flesh is pierced, poisons forced,
I am held in tender embrace–
its whispers an oasis to the fears
that boil within my breast.

A skyward calling, its promised hope
glistens the starlight above me.
Memories, regret, longings and dreams–
a cycle ripened to revolve anew
cascades within my being.
I then behold a fleeting sight–
a son, wife, a father, my life–
their love commanding,
gazes imploring.

Therefore
with a strength untold
I fight
until with the sun
I am ushered
out of the grasp
of the ebbing eve.

I open my eyes.

 

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◊ The Cardiac Arrest – A Physician’s Perspective ◊

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Code Blue [a poem]

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A code called.
She races
as the seas part
for her crossing.
Reposed before her–
rhythm without pulse,
fluid without flow,
substance without life–
is you.

Invaded
as lines in your thigh
penetrate a pump paralyzed,
as tube between ashen lips
thrusts into stagnant air.
Poison pushed into a heart
quivering, she watches as
your chest rises
with the force
of each counterfeit breath.

The symphony begins.

Thump
Shock delivered.
Strike through the breast.
Voltage down your limbs.
Buoyant, jerking,
Each retort
a life feigned by lightening.

Crunch
Bones crush.
The carol of ribs,
a surrender to the fury
of each compression,
quickens with her pounding heart.
Each chord
a dissonant harmony.

Glazed are your eyes
as they pulsate
with the cadence of their dance.
She looks at you.
Pleads for you to return.
Prays to the god she plays.
But your eyes plead for something more.

You leave her.

The story ends.

And the orchestra leaves.

•      •      •

◊ The Cardiac Arrest From a Patient’s Perspective ◊

The Sleep.

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Rivulets of sorrow meandering
down tear-stained skin.
“Keep her comfortable
until it’s time.”   
Simple words-
echoes
of eternal reminder within.
You rise.

Guiding her
through the threshold
into the chill,
shudders
of realization emerge.
You survey
the molting trees,
their arid leaves
embellishing her hair
like fragments of
woven rhinestones.
As if they weep for her.
As if even the ambiances
of ages past are beseeching
her not to leave.

Soon arrives the Foehn,
holding you within
its warm embrace.
Its breaths,
whispering lines of truth,
sculpt a bittersweet tune
as they herald
the evening’s arrival.
You understand.

Cloaked
by lyrics of singing ivy,
her expression calms,
your fears dissolve.
Consoled by a draft possessive,
you cradle her
through the darkness
and follow her
toward the seraph’s call
into the fold of
midnight slumber.

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